Tuesday, May 5, 2015

Happiness starts with these tips? Maybe?

 I want to formally apologize for my lack of posts the past two weeks. If you saw my last post you will remember me talking about Leap 4... Leap 4 can suck my left butt cheek. My once easy baby is currently a needy ball of screams. That and celebrating my birthday has made it a little hard to post everyday. Hopefully now that Leap 4 is calming down, I'll be able to write more often. Thank you all for your patience and loyalty.

 Now that's over, lets get talking!
I was recently linked to an article of the 'Secrets of Happy Moms'. The article is HERE if you'd like to read it. The whole article has 10 'secrets' to remaining happy. Some I agreed with, and some I rolled my eyes so hard they almost got stuck. Here the 10 tips, and my interpretation on them. Of course they will be sassy as hell.

1. Lean on the Community- The article said that going out for a 'Mom's night' leaves you more optimistic. I couldn't agree more with that, however I wouldn't call it leaning on the community. I really am not a fan of strangers. I am comfortable with my 'Band of Bitches'. I think it's really important to know that you are indeed allowed to step away. (I went to the grocery store alone on Sunday, it was like a vacation) Leave kid with grandma, mother in law, hubby or even go on Care.com and hire a babysitter. Being a parent is a full time job, you need a winecation.
  Even going out with my Mom 2.0 makes me feel 1000 times better... So Tater Mama's tip:
1) Get the hell out of the house without the baby

2. Commit to Healthy Living- I laughed a lot when I read this part. The direct quote that got me was Exercise, try to get adequate sleep, schedule regular massages and make healthy food choices to feel your best.
What?? The people who wrote this would totally hate me. My breakfast is coffee, my lunch is usually a granola bar. I don't remember what adequate sleep is. I'm pretty sure that went away when I was 4 Months pregnant. Regular massages? HA!!! yeah, let me pull that 80 dollars out of my asshole 2 times a month to go have a massage. These people are on drugs if they think that is actually going to happen.  I do exercise because I'm really tired of wearing maternity jeans. Doing a 30 minute walk does help my sanity. I also know I need to start eating regular meals.
2) Try your best to treat your body better.

3. Make time for Personal Pursuits. Yes... Writing here is my saving grace. I started Raising Tater to have something for myself. (There are only so many bubble baths one can take). I think it's really important to have something for you. Read a book, knit a sweater! Hey even start a snarky blog! The 15-45 minutes I have to write are my peaceful hours. I wouldn't try to change them for the world.

4. Nourish Yourself. I honestly think this ties in to number 2. This section talks about how we tend to throw meals together instead of enjoying cooking. I'm really curious to know if this person ever had a baby? I cook dinner every night either with a baby in a high chair, or strapped to my chest (Thank you Boba wrap company, I love you.) Not once have I found measuring ingredients soothing...
4) Feed yourself. A handful of Cheerios is not  meal.

5. Laugh. They nailed this one on the head. Having a family can be hilarious. My kid is 4 months old, and I sometimes feel he has more personality than most adults. If that isn't funny to you watch some garbage TV, or read my blog. I'm clearly the funniest person ever.

6. Follow a spiritual practice. If this is for you great. If not, also great! A lot of people find comfort in religion, and many don't. I know on a REALLY bad day a bible verse really isn't going to make me feel better. If Amy Poehler was a religion, I would follow that. However, find something that you can read, or do that makes you feel better. If CNN is your Torah, rock on.
6) Follow something you like

7. Practice Gratitude. I agree with this. On days were I have a screaming baby, a splitting headache, and no time to poop I find it hard to be thankful. I often have to remind myself how many wonderful things are around me. I have a lovely home, a fantastic husband, friends who outshine the world, and a constant support system around me. I am SO lucky to have what I do, but all of that is often forgotten. At the end of each day write down 3 things you are grateful for that day. Today mine is Coffee, Target, and B.

8. Get your groove on! The article talks about going to a Jazzercise class or something. I personally love turning on some T-swizzle and busting a really horrible move in my kitchen, Tater loves it when we dance, and he also really loves Taylor Swift. he's totally my kid. Dancing absolutely makes you feel better.

9. Set boundaries. Moms who are happier make conscious decisions on a daily basis about who and what is allowed into their lives. Switching to this way of thinking is empowering. You don’t have to be harsh or hurtful to accomplish this goal. Politely decline invitations that don’t fit with your priorities and limit interactions with negative individuals.  
 Toxic people SUCK. You shouldn't have to surround yourself with them. It is 100% okay to tell people no! Even if it's people you love. If you just want to be alone, and the whole gang wants to come over, say no! They may be hurt but I assure you they will get over it.

10. Avoid Comparison. I am so guilty of comparing myself, and mom skills to those around me. I did it at the grocery store the other day. This woman had a 6 month old baby, and looked fantastic. I overheard her say she lost 60 pounds. I started trying to figure out what the hell was wrong with me. I looked at her perky boobs, and really cute outfit and felt like garbage. That woman is not me. It's really important to knock that shit off. That mom with the Coach diaper bag is not better then you. You are a great mom. Remember that.

I would like to thank Colorado Parent magazine and Christa Hines for writing this article. I don't agree with all that was said, but I think the idea it self is incredibly important.  ALL parents should practice healthy habits for happiness. If these things are working for you and you continue you to feel down please consult a doctor.

May is Mental Health Awareness Month! Stay happy my friends. Don't be afraid to seek help. Together we can end the stigma of mental healthcare.

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